Last night's thoughts

As I lay there last night not sleeping, I began thinking about gay marriage for no reason I can discern. I was thinking about how people opposed to gay marriage say that it devalues or threatens their marriages. The gays disagree with this analysis, as they believe love is love. But I can see the intolerants' point of view.

Let's say traditional marriage is a Rated-G movie. You know what you're going to get and how far the definition of a G movie extends. Then say the Motion Picture Association decides that the definition of G-Rated movies will be expanded to include both Bambi and also Revenge of the Aliens' Deadly Spawn. Suddenly, a G rating doesn't mean the same thing. It now includes nearly the opposite of its original distinction. A G rating is now meaningless to those who oppose Aliens Deadly Spawning.

You can see how people think like this. However, they forget that most marriages end in divorce- the true opposite of the definition of marriage's "'til death do us part" oath. That's like saying G-rated movies can have no foul language or nudity or violence, except they can show anal rape when both characters are smiling. In traditional marriage, the exception- divorce- is now more prevalent than the rule.

But whatever. People who actually believe that gay marriage devalues straight marriage aren't usually capable of abstraction and metaphors, and vote accordingly. Let them eat cake and get fat.

Legalizing gay marriage is the shortcut solution. The real solution is to decouple the definitions of legal marriage and church-sanctioned marriage. This should happen with two pieces of legislation. The first recognizes only legal marriage as defined by a marriage certificate, and clarifies that all rights and laws referring to marriage refer only to legal marriage. Though this may technically be the case already (polygamous Mormon marriages are illegal), it in no way denigrates church marriage. It just clarifies the distinction between church and state marriage.

Then the stage is set for state-sanctioned gay marriage. It becomes legal issue, not a religious one. The two types of marriage are different; separate but unequal. Church marriage can be considered "better" than state marriage in the eyes of those who want it, but there would no longer be legal ramifications of that.

Let the churches continue to condemn gay marriage and let church-married people continue feeling superior in the eyes of whatever god they pray to. (That's what religion is all about anyway.) Let the Catholic Church call legal gay marriage immoral and anti-biblical or whatever, and let it continue its decline into irrelevance.

But the argument that gay marriage denigrates straight marriage-their prime talking point- would be diminished. The Klu Klux Klan is a despicable organization that has a right to exist because recognizing it is the legally correct (and morally incorrect) thing to do. Gay marriage, whatever one's viewpoint of it, should be in the same boat. Our ability to recognize, if not respect, the right for dissenting behaviors and opinions, so long as they do not harm anyone, is what makes our country strong and flexible in a changing world. Gay marriage: do it for America!