People who want you to explain what a blog is to them

Sure thing, as soon as you explain to me how it is you're still living in 1992.

People who study the snot in the tissue after they blow their noses

That's just gross. I don't even want to think about what they do in the bathroom.

Black girls who have to repeat every sentence three times

"Do not talk to me."
"I said- excuse me? excuse me? I SAID. Do not TALK to me."
"Do NOT. Talk to Me. "

People who drink Red Bull and vodka

It's the candy necklace and ecstasy of the frat boy set.

Big fat ladies who wear tiny little backpacks

I don't know why, but I always feel sorry for the backpack.

People who listen to their voicemail on speakerphone

Why are you thrusting your life in my earhole?