Boring people with interesting hair

I guess I should be chatting with your stylist instead of you.

People who ask, "How was your vacation?"

The reason I have a blog is so that I don't have to talk to you.

People who line up for the breakfast buffet

I don't wait in line for food. What is this, Russia?

People who stand up and stretch ten times during the flight

They're the ones who probably don't get off the couch that many times a night.

People who play the in-flight movie at absurdly high volumes

See, the point of the headphones is so that I don't have to listen to your poor choices in entertainment.

People who walk down the aisle of the plane keeping one hand on the overhead luggage compartment the whole way

Are you worried you're going to get lost unless you hold on?

People who talk about religion in public

I just wanted eggs. Why did I get a side order of Jesus?